Topic: Five Fears That You Have
1. Fear of losing my parents sooner than later.
I know this is inevitable. I just want it to be later. I guess we all do. I should consider myself lucky that I do have them both, they are in good health, and they are loving what they are doing. I have watched my parents go through the loss of their parents. Some earlier than expected. I don’t remember from my younger days, but I do remember more as I got older. I know I will have to embrace what my mother’s mom, my grandmother had said. I remember it well. “Make sure you are not sad when I die, you make sure you have a big party and celebrate my life.” It is interesting that this topic comes up just days after saying goodbye to my grandmother 3 years ago. (I hope my mom isn’t crying too much when she reads this)
2. Fear of losing my own family.
I have dreams of this happening. Although, I don’t always see the ending, or the actual faces, but it’s a family in my dreams that seems like my own. I think this is a true fear for anyone with a family.
3. Silly fear of thunderstorms.
For years I have not enjoyed a thunderstorm. I would cower under my covers and try to block out the sounds and the light. Living in Ontario now, these storms are much more frequent then in Newfoundland. I still don’t enjoy them and I will be up all night if one happens overnight. I will have to try to block out the sounds and try to sleep. Usually I fail at this, and will be super tired the next day.
4. Getting sick.
Not your typical sick, but something not so great. Something that will change your life. I try not to think of this very often, but the thought is there sometimes. I guess this is the ultimate fear for most, the unknown of the end. (sorry, little dark there) Usually when I have a pain from a sport that takes longer to go away, wondering if it is actually something else. Eventually though, I get better and go on with my usual routine.
Now I have to really think. I could stop at 4, but this is a challenge, so I will get to 5. It’s interesting how the first few are easier to figure out. Is it I’m not fearful of anything else? NO. That’s not the case. I just don’t think these fears are major. I always have a fear of the possibility of loosing my job, loosing money, house, possession items, etc.
5. Fear of normalcy?
I like to do things that are different, I love being spontaneous, I love the adventures I go on. Not having these things would mean having my day be the same day, all the time, year after year. This would be a huge fear for me. I don’t want to live your basic routine life. I get it that there are times when this happens. Heck, my job could be considered this. Every day, teach students. But within those days, there are great things that happen to create times that far from normal. I have wonderful conversations with these students, hopefully making their life not seem so normal from the basic school routine. I try to connect with students that are not actually ones I teach. In my mind, I sometimes (who am I kidding, I always…) feel younger than what I am and I enjoy sharing these experiences I have been through with these MUCH younger minds and I hope that they don’t end up with a fear of normalcy.